Schedule and Safety

         

         Because I teach homeschoolers, I only meet with them once a week for 1 - 1.5 hours. I cram in as much as I can in that time, making sure each student understands for the most part. 

     Each of my classes follows the same format or schedule. When the students arrive they pull out a pencil, and I hand them the ice breaker slip of paper. I ask the ice breaker question and give example answers, If you had wings, where would you fly to?  As high up as possible. The top of the Los Angeles US Bank building at night with its lights on. Over the mountains to the desert. (For ice breakers explanation, please see my post of Ice Breakers, Jan. 2018.)

      Next I ask the students to take out the poetry handout I gave them the previous week. They read the poems as homework, and now we discuss them fully and have our Poetry Madness vote. Poetry is a quick package as a model for writing and literary analysis. (Please see my post of Poetry Madness, Jan. 2018.)

     I have also assigned a reading. It might be an act from a Shakespeare play or a few chapters of a novel. We discuss this as much as possible, and I give them background on the author, the novel, or a character. For instance, many novels contain dragons. I will give them historical background on dragons and tell them what a dragon represents or symbolizes. Or I might concentrate on a character, discussing strengths and weaknesses, archetype, and character conflicts.

I tell the students with poetry and literature analysis: they are never wrong because it is interpretation. It’s better to guess than to not try. Analysis takes practice too, again hard work and diligence.  I do allow the students to discuss issues with opinions.  Animal Farm and 1984 by George Orwell bring up many issues that we face today, and the discussions can be lively.

  Finally we reach the writing portion of class. Here’s where I introduce a writing tool, skill, or formula. I often give a handout and model on the board, using student ideas. Then the students practice it.  This is when I try to walk around and see if everyone understands, brainstorming where needed. At home, students will  incorporate the skill into their homework assignment.  

     One of my goals as a writing teacher is to create a safe environment in the classroom to share writings. I know how difficult writing is; it takes focus and diligence.  In class we are at this phase: hard work, so the writing is not perfect or refined when I am asking the students to share.  In a group the ones who offer to share first are the extraverts. I try several ways to soften each class into one in which a quieter person can also feel comfortable to share. The ice breakers work miracles toward this goal. Everyone shares, and everyone is heard and noticed. Rarely does a student not participate in the ice breaker; it’s usually when he/she can’t think of an answer to write down. The ice breaker does its job: serves as an easy, fun way to get to know each other.  Pretty quickly a bond forms between the whole class; they all are eager for the ice breaker when they walk in the door. It almost becomes a game, like Apples to Apples, guessing who might write which idea.

    I do not allow comments on content. I constantly remind the students of this for the first few weeks in class, but they usually understand by the time we are well into the semester.  Peer pressure aids me in this. The students want to hear others’ writings and ideas. 

    Sharing your writing among others requires a safe environment. Writing can be art or from the heart, and baring either is risky. I always point out the best parts of the writing or simply whoop. I want the sharing to be positive. 

      Sometimes putting the students in groups helps the fear of sharing. If they have to present at the end of class, commiserating makes it less frightening.  I don’t use groups that often, because writing is personal and,  really, a solitary activity. However, the students do learn from others in a group, even if they are not offering much. And I feel the presentations hold value for safety.

   Last, I don’t push students to participate in anything; I believe this also helps in creating a safe environment. Some students need to observe first before deciding to join in. During the classes with group activities, some students prefer to work on their own.

    There are the rare students who will not feel safe to speak up in class or share writing. I do not comment on this. I ask gently, and I take “no” for an answer. I believe this builds trust between us. After all, they are handing me their papers. They know I read them intently, and this is a safety issue in my eyes too.  

Poetry 180

   My aim is to plug students into poem power. My middle schoolers and high schoolers read poetry in every class.  Poems can be silly, serious, enigmatic, moody, fantastic. or colorful.  You never know what the students will like; bring an eclectic mix to their attention, and see what happens.

I assign poems as homework the previous week. I ask students to read each poem twice. The first time, they often mumble, “Meh,” or “What?” But the second time, they might understand the gist or a line, or they might feel melancholy, or calm or uplifted. When we read aloud in class, that’s a third time a student is exposed to the same poem, making it familiar. We discuss the poem thoroughly, and I always ask a question or two when we are done with our analysis, a modern query from the poem that relates to the students’ lives. Have you ever been afraid or felt uncomfortable in a new situation? (First Day at School by McGough)  What is the message to today’s world leaders from this poem? (Ozymandias by Shelley) 

    To find poems for middle schoolers, there are plenty on the web. There’s a site for Middle School 180 poems. This mimics US Poet Laureate Billy Collins’ Poetry 180 project for high schoolers (a poem/school day/year). I also like another US Poet Laureate’s project, the Favorite Poem Project by Robert Pinsky. He asked US citizens to send him the name of their favorite poem with a letter explaining why it is their favorite. He also asked for information about the sender, including age, occupation, and town residence. He chose some entries and compiled them into a book, which is in every library. Some of the participants were even videotaped, and you can watch them on this site: http://www.favoritepoem.org

     I send this Favorite Poem Project video to my middle school and American Literature students:

http://www.favoritepoem.org/poem_ImNobodyWhoareyou288.html

    It was sent in by a teen in Georgia who could relate to this particular Emily Dickinson poem. The teen is candid, and the video is wonderful! I think she speaks for many teens in our busy world today.

    For high schoolers, there are poems in literature textbooks, and I often supplement these with others by the same poet. If there is a parent from another country we are studying, I ask the parent his/her favorite national poem or poet, adding the selection to our collection. Websites such as Cummings and Shmoop offer terrific analyses on the web for your discussion notes.  

    I have learned so much about poetry, poets, and writing by presenting poems to children. I believe this is key to passing them on. I am learning too, and because I love the poems, I am excited about them. Sometimes I don’t understand a poem, but this too is valuable for students to know. We don’t have to understand something to appreciate it or like it. Each poem affects the reader in a different way or provides a different message even.  Think of abstract art, a canvas of color by Rothko or paint smatter by Pollack. We like them; we might not know why.  

I use different handouts to examine poems. My favorite is a method with a ridiculous acronym, TPCASTT. I can never remember it, so I call it Tap Cat. It’s pretty simple if you go through each step in the acrostic. An easy poem to use it on is When Earth’s Last Picture is Painted by Rudyard Kipling. I did find this on the web about 10 years ago.  Here’s the handout:

ANALYZING POETRY

       Read the poem twice. The first time concentrate on understanding the words and what is going on in the poem. The second time you read the poem, begin piecing the information/story/speaker's words together.

      Focus on the SITUATION of the poem.

      -- Who is the Speaker?

      -- Who is the Speaker talking to?

      -- What is going on? What is the setting?

      -- Do you trust the Speaker?

      -- What is the Tone? (how the author feels)

      -- What is the Mood? (how the poem makes YOU feel)

      Focus on the STRUCTURE of the poem.

      --What is the Foot and Meter?

      -- Is there Rhyming? Is there a Rhyme Scheme?

      -- Is there a Shift or Movement in the Poem?

      -- What type of punctuation or grammar does the poem have?

      -- Go back to the title of the poem: Does this clarify the meaning for you?

   

      Focus on the LANGUAGE of the poem:

      --What types of Figurative Languages are there? (metaphor, simile, hyperbole...)

      -- Are there any allusions to mythology, religion, or history?

      -- What kind of Diction is there?

      Ask yourself: SO WHAT? Now that you've analyzed the Situation, Structure, and Language of the poem, what seems to be most important for finding out the poem’s meaning? By asking yourself this question you should come to one or two solid conclusions about the poem you have just read!

  TPCASTT    Method of  Analyzing Poetry:

T = Title:      What does the title mean?

P = Paraphrase:    Change poet’s words into ones you can understand.

C =  Connotation/Diction: What are the words the poet used in place of an idea, person, object?

A =  Attitude/Tone:  What is the poet’s or speaker’s attitude/mood?  How do you feel?

S = Shift:  How does the poem shift, or character shift into change, or where is there a contrast?

T=  Title Revisited:  After studying the poem, does the title take on a new meaning?

T= Theme:  What is the theme(s) in the poem?

Poetry Madness

         Several years ago my husband gave me a compact white G4 Apple iBook. Fear gripped me for two whole years before I opened the electronic beastie. I had some forced experience previously with the formidable desktop monster,  our daughters taunting me to learn how to use a CD-Rom or to load digital photos.  I finally approached the neglected laptop in shame, only to find a world open up. I took classes at the Apple Store, learning how to use the miraculous machine and the word processing program, and I’ve been hooked ever since. My laptop contains my work; it’s the backbone of my classes. It’s such a small contraption that holds so much. 

         Poetry is exactly the same. Folks first contemplate a poem in fear. What does it mean? Why is it so short? Why is it so long? Is it speaking to me?  Why are the words making no sense?  Why can’t it just say what it means?  What’s the point?  But once inside a poem, having slowed down to take in each word, the package offers a gift. With a few tools in the kit, like the recognition of alliteration, figurative language, imagery, and tone, we begin to notice the little piece of writing does indeed have something to convey.  And what a poem conveys is personal. Often a poem touches different readers in different ways. It might be just a mood, like sadness.  It might trigger a memory. It might be humor or wit. It might be an epiphany.

     I was surfing the net on my iBook when I came upon the perfect enticement for subjecting my students to poems. It’s Poetry Madness, named after March Madness in basketball. I altered the game on the net, and I use it all semester-- in fact, every class. I assign two poems for my middle school class to read weekly (and often more to my high school classes). The following class, we read aloud the poems and discuss them. Then I ask the students to vote on their favorite of the two (or the bunch for the high schoolers). Quite quickly, the students begin to own the poems. They have opinions, likes and dislikes, and they are interested in others’ opinions.  We repeat this each week with the weekly poems, and on the second to last class, we have our semester Poetry Madness vote. We revisit, reading aloud, each of the weekly winners, eliminating by vote as we progress through the list, until we come up with our favorite of the entire semester. 

Poetry Madness is infectious. My new students begin fall semester dreading the notion and hassle of reading poems, but by the middle of the semester, about 6 weeks, they begin to actually like poetry.  The more clever a poem, the more interested my students are.  The stranger the format, such as in a sestina or a prose poem, the more fascinated the students. Poems are surprise packages, pocket fortune cookies to unfold and find bits of wisdom or entertainment inside.  Just like a laptop! 

Ice Breakers

        If you were stuck in an elevator, who would you like to be stuck with?  My mom; Aristotle; a firefighter; my BFF; my dad; my dog; Spiderman. 

  I start every class with an ice breaker. I give out small pieces of scratch paper, all the same size, on which the student writes an answer to my question of the day. This is then folded in fours and placed at the end of the desk to be collected. It’s important they all are folded alike. A volunteer collects all these, mixes them up, and deals them out to everyone. One student is selected to start, opens the new ice breaker, reads it aloud, and has 2-3 guesses who wrote it.  If the guesses are incorrect, the writer confesses, and this writer opens her new ice breaker, reading aloud and guessing, continuing on.

The students love ice breakers so much that I can’t skip a single class ice breaker. Sometimes I’d like to. They take at least 10-15 minutes, and I have so much to cover each class. But the ice breaker is important for several reasons. 

  First, the students know what to expect when they arrive in class. They slide into their seats, whip out their pencils, and contemplate what to answer for the ice breaker. What would your license plate say in 7 characters? If you had a million dollars, what would you do with it? If you could have an extra body part, which one and where would it be?   I always give them a model answer: an extra eye on the back of your head; an extra ear on the top of your head; or an extra thumb on each foot to grab with. Sometimes they use a variation of my suggestions, but often they come up with some fantastical, hilarious, or deep answers.

   Second, the students bond quickly, becoming acquainted through their ideas. Often, ice breakers reveal thinking styles, such as scientific or logical, zany or quirky, maybe even a combo of these. By the end of the semester, students easily guess who wrote what by the style or idea offered.  

This leads to the main reason I use ice breakers: the sharing value of writing. My own daughters who were homeschooled attended high school for one year. They wanted to discover if they were as smart as peers who attend school. It took them about a week to find out they were. Using the ice breaker, it takes 10-15 minutes. A student learns his ideas are indeed similar to his peers’ ideas. Sometimes they are even the same. Often they are unique. The student experiences the validity of his own idea. Students also learn how others think, and they can learn new patterns of thought and cleverness, expanding their own. For example, What is something you really don’t like?  Usually the answer is a food, such as broccoli or seafood. But there is an occasional social issue: hunger or bullying. And once in a while there is some silliness: pickle popsicles. 

            It’s very important to create a safe place for ice breakers, so I set these three rules. 

                1. We don’t comment or care about spelling. We are all learning. 

                       2. No negative comments on others’ ideas. 

        3. No pointing to people when guessing. Use a person’s name. 

One ice breaker is to  rename the ice breaker. Here’s a few favorites: brain cracker, snow melter, super starter,  brain booster, get-to-knower, guessing machine, and (a prize to this portmanteau:) anonymaguess,

I always ask my students as an end-of-the-school-year ice breaker, What’s a good ice breaker?  I’m able to add to my store with this one. I have tried to keep a list of ice breakers for the most part. Again, I have snitched some online, some from a card deck called Chat Pack: Fun Questions to Spark Conversations, and some from friends. Here is my list to date, a bit messy but a massive amount.

ICE BREAKERS

Describe each day of the week as if it’s a person.

What one invention would you uninvent if you could, and why?

What is a good ice breaker?

What is not a good ice breaker?

Create a season.

If you could name a fruit, what would it be?

If you could live within a novel for a day, which book would you choose, what would you tell the characters, and how would your presence alter the story?

If you could be transported into any novel, which one would you travel into, and what would you do/how would you change the story?

Create a new career that would help the world somehow.

Name a new cheese.

If you could see the future, what would you want to see?

You’re in a dark alley, running from a flaming Zamboni. What happened, and what happens next?

Create a new word.

If you could make any inanimate object animate, what would it be and why?

What task would you want to be done by a machine for you? (not homework, school, learning machines)

If you were a car, which would you be?

If you were a plant, what plant would you be?

How do you plan on obtaining a unicorn?

What’s the weirdest way you’ve become hurt?

Where are you going/went for the summer?

Where is your favorite place to do homework?

If only one animal existed on the planet, what would you want it to be?

If you were a polygon, which one would you be, and why?

What is the best way to eat a watermelon?

If you could have an unlimited amount of body parts, this body part would it be?

What is the meaning of life?

If you could have one superpower, what would it be and what would you use it for?

If you could fly to any planet, which one would it be? 

If you had to choose to look like one person in the world, who would you choose? 

What is your favorite type of rain? (monsoon, hail, etc.)

If you have to teach a class, what would you teach? 

If you could live in any time, when would it be? (1600s, 1900s, 3000s, etc.)

Create a food. (desserts ok)

Imagine an enchanted animal and name it.

Which other state would you want to live in?

If you had to name a day that started with the letter, Q, what would the name be? 

If you could be any fictional animal, what would it be? 

What is your favorite emoji?

What is your favorite cartoon character?

What is your favorite ugly color?

If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would you go? 

If you were a shoe, what shoe would you be?

What is your favorite Olympic game?

What is your favorite TV character?

If you could only have one emotion, what would it be? 

What is a goal you have for your future?

If you could create any object with a clap, what would it be?

If you could go back in time for one year, what year would you go to?

If you had to choose a job that you would have for the rest of your life, what would it be?

What word would you get rid of?

If you had to live off one type of food what would it be? 

What is your favorite time of day and why? 

What is your favorite flavor of muffin? 

What did you eat for breakfast?

What is your favorite mode of transportation? (boat, plane, etc.)

What are Saturdays for? 

If you had a choice to be any type of fruit, what would you be? 

If you can turn into any animal, what animal would you turn into? 

If you had a horse, what would you name it? 

Where does Mrs. Erin come up with her ice breakers?

If you can change a part of your body, what would it be? 

What magical power would you like? 

What’s your favorite food?

If you could create your own hot sauce, what would it be called and what’s it made of? 

If you could own an illegal pet, which would you own?

Create a new animal.

If you had one day to do anything, what would you do? 

Create a new instrument.

Name a new element. 

What is your favorite color/

If you had control over the weather, what would be the first thing you would do? 

If you could create a new language, what would it be called?

If you had to give yourself a new name, what would it be? 

Where would you go once and never again?

Fall 2016:

Week 1: Alliteration- how many in a sentence.

Week 1 Writing: favorite word

Week 2: If you could do something an animal could do that humans can’t , what would it be?  e.g. fly like a bird, swim like a fish, sleep upside down like a bat. etc.

Week 3: What is the best and worst thing that happened yesterday?

Week 4: If you were invisible, where would you go? what would you do? 

Week 5: Create a name for a plant that sings.

Week 6: If you could own a pet mythical creature, what would it be?

Week 7: If you could have a lifetime supply of something what would it be?

Week 8: What is the most beautiful thing in the world?

Week 9: New name for a bar of soap.

Week 10: Two words that rhyme. Or Think of a rhyming pair e.g. mellow jello:  Describe so that person can guess it: e.g. relaxed low-calorie jiggly dessert.

Week 11: What is your favorite thing to do?

Week 12: Create a season: name and describe.

Spring 2017:

Week 1: Name of a Movie Star

Week 2: “Oops,” muttered Miss Klinkfelder. Why did she say oops, describe what led up to Miss Klinkfelder’s oops. 

Week 3: ***If you could be transported into any novel, which one would you travel into, and what would you do/how would you change the story?   (Phoebe)

Week 4:  If you could make a puzzle, what would the picture be of?

Week 5: If you could create a company what would its purpose and name be?

Week 6: New name for a candy and what is it?

Week 7: Name of a pirate.

Week 8: Favorite 1,2,3,4 syllable words.

Week 9: If you were a plant, which would you be? venus fly trap, 4 leaf clover, spiny cactus, towering oak 

Week 10: What is your favorite animal sound?

Week 11: If you could do anything you want in the morning, what would it be? sleep, read a book, watch TV

Week 12: Why did the chicken cross the road?

Week 13: If you could choose to dream about something at night, what would it be?

Week 14: New name for a car.

Week 15: If you could become a god, what would you be a god of?

Week 16: If you could ask a dog or a cat one question they could answer, what would the question be?

Week 17: What is the best reason for doing nothing?

Week 18: If you could create an island all to yourself by breaking a chunk off an existing continent, what would you call it and where would if be?

ICE BREAKERS, fall 2017

If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would you go? 

What is your favorite ugly color?

If you were a shoe, what shoe would you be?

How do you plan on obtaining a unicorn?

What are Saturdays for? 

Name a dance move.

If you could fly, where would you fly to?

What do you have to do to make a wish come true?

Make up a mneumonic...planets in order, Central American countries.

Make up a new god, god of what and what’s the name?

If you were a pirate, where would you bury your treasure?

Create a name for a fast food joint.

spring 2016 suggestions:

name of a planet

name of a musician or rock band

name of a fruit

create a season

if you could go to space, what one thing would you bring with you?

If you had to be transported into the past where and when would you go?

If you could combine any 2 animals what would they be?

If you could change your age to any age you wanted, and you would stay that age, what would it be?

If you could name a mountain, what would it be?

If you could have a lifetime supply of something what would it be?

What’s your favorite animal?

If you could go anywhere, where would it be?  live anywhere?

If you could create an atom (element) what would it be? and do?

If you could have whatever you want what would it be? get ears pierced, a dog

If you were a fantasy creature, which one would you be?

If you could own a pet mythical creature, what would it be?

If you were to invent something what would it be?

If you were an alien what would your species be called?

If you could have 3 superpowers, what would they be?

If you wanted to name the earth something else, what would you name it?

If you wrote a book what would it be called?

What ice breaker did you dislike most?

What is your favorite movie?

What would you name your pants?

How would you like to die?

If you could live in someone else’s body, who would it be?

Name a new color.

If you could name a new sports team, what would it be?

Name a dance move.

New name for a pencil. or anything else.

If you could name a sailboat, what would its name be?

If you could name a fruit, what would its name be?

Your nickname.

Create a name for a new dog/cat breed.

If you could only say one sentence for the rest of your life what would it be?

Name your autobiography.

Create a word and its meaning.

Create another word for birdhouse.

If you could fly, where would you fly to?

If you were a pirate, where would you hide your treasure?

Name for a pet dragon.

Create a name for a plant that sings.

New name for a fast food joint.

3 best things that happened to you yesterday

Make up a secret handshake

If you chewed the color blue, what would it taste like

name of a flying car

common name of a new species (spitfire mole)

tweet in so many chars

video game name  or board game  or setting or plot

emoticons, 

What's a name of a new Superhero

If you were a dog, what would you bury?

If you could ask a dog or a cat one question they could answer, what would the question be

If you were an ocean animal, which one would you be?

If anything could grow on trees, what would you have grow on trees

What does a thinking cap look like?

If your friend was an alien, what would you do together?

AWE

       I am retiring in 2-3 years. I love my job as an English teacher, because I love reading and writing and children. I’ve been lucky enough to be touched by the lives and inner words of many children over the past years. I’ve received papers on muscle cars, Minecraft, best friends, pets, a first scuba dive, summer camp, baby brothers, hunger, second hand smoke, and the best method to pick up dog poop. I am constantly blown away by amazing poems, passionate persuasive essays, and clever short stories crafted by my students. 

  It takes about 2 years for a young writer to really take off in writing with solid skills and confidence.  I’d like to take credit for that, but really it’s simply all the practice. Laid out mathematically, it takes 26 in-class writing activities plus weekly homework per year, times two years, to attain a fine level of mastery. (I meet with homeschooling students in a classroom setting once a week during the school year. ) So that’s 52 weeks in all, concentrating on writing, to begin to feel very confident.  I’d say that 75% of that is playing with language.  Play with sound, rhythm of words, vocabulary, figurative language, etc. And play with voice: Who are you, writer? Who are you today? Who have you become as a writer? How do you tell your stories?  

My goal in writing this blog weekly is to pass on my teaching materials and enthusiasm. Not every skill or suggestion works for every child. I can throw crazy assignments at kiddos, and some run with them. Others don’t, but something else will inspire them. The goal is not the product but the process. I never comment on content, only on the writing itself.  Even with literary analysis, the students are learning, and it’s not as important if their answers are right in their essays as the clear, strong presentation of ideas.

For my weekly assignments and handouts, I have snitched from all over. To name a few: the internet, books of course, The Writer magazine, my daughter’s college creative writing assignments, Natalie Goldberg’s quintessential Writing Down the Bones, and my college literature anthology, Literature: An Introduction to Fiction, Poetry, and Drama by XL Kennedy.  I will give credit where I remember. Please excuse when I cannot recall where my information originated from.  I’ve created my own handouts from compilations of several sources over many years, and my documentation is spotty at best. The main purpose is to teach children with the knowledge and suggestions of ones wiser in the field. 

Last, my advice to all teachers is to have fun yourself! If you are enthusiastic about the assignment or the subject, you exude the highly contagious AWE virus. (AWE = art, wonder, excitement. ) Learn beside your students, and you are subtly passing on the love of learning. Be as clever as you can, and allow your students to be clever too. One kudos for cleverness jettisons a student to new heights of aplomb, trust, and courage. 

Sailing by Default

   I’m not sure default is the word I am looking for to describe our sailing education/experience so far. As we mean to sail successfully, we have done so, no real expertise on our part. We haven’t capsized or had to row home.  But we have almost slammed into countless boats as we cruise back to the loading dock. We have held white-knuckled onto lines while the boat tips forty-five degrees. And we have slept inside at a slip, afraid to disembark due to a gaggle of harbor seals lounging in our path to the bathroom. We have also romantically sailed into thick fog, emerging into a regatta of angry sloops in full spinnaker regalia—-ciao!

    I could mean sailing by “jerryrigging.” I looked this up in the dictionary: 

        1. Nautical. a temporary rig to replace a permanent rig that has been

           disabled, lost overboard, etc.

       2. any makeshift arrangement of machinery or the like. 

Of course I meant the second definition, but my goodness, the first definition sounds like a nightmare, albeit an assured possibility for us! I fear this really is what I mean, since we mistakenly assemble and hoist, tie and toss. We have hoisted unknowingly the wrong type of sail, have hauled the boat improperly on the trailer, and have ventured out with a non-working motor ( a motor is essential to sailors like us who can’t sail back to port).

We do not have one proper knot on the ship.  I intend to learn some, but I can’t find my Klutz Book of Knots I bought our children 20 years ago; I thought it might be my speed. Years ago I took a sailing class through Park and Recreation. The teacher was a sailing sarge, screaming at us from ashore, as we fluttered willy-nilly in the harbor. I stuck the class out for a few weeks, almost learning some knots, but couldn’t return after receiving a particularly humiliating tirade from Sarge when it was my turn at the helm.

     Our boat’s name is Sea Sharp, alluding to my husband, the musician.  I fear others suspect we are Sea Dull, but we hope they are too busy mulling over the name’s meaning to really pay attention to what we are doing.

     When you name a boat you are supposed to christen it to not offend the sea god/gods. Champagne is required but we used red wine.  We used good red wine because we like it, and we didn’t want to offend said gods with cheap stuff. The wine stained the fiberglass because we didn’t want to break a bottle and make a mess. The wine splashed on and past the all important-to-christen bow. We managed to save a glassful for each of us to toast the christening. We recited a poem my husband plucked off the internet, and I hope this satisfies the god/gods who receive a lot of internet play if you look for them.

     Sea Sharp’s mast is one tall mother. I’m afraid to look up that high. Getting the mast up is the most frightening step for us. We aren’t even in the water at this point; the boat is still on the trailer attached to the car, out in the parking lot at the launching area. The mast is an awkward lance of old. My husband watched a Youtube video about a funky apparatus that safely pulls the mast into place. It works great but is a rather huge embarrassment in action. It’s an upside-down v-shaped wooden thingamabob that my husband cleverly copied. It’s wearing discarded black socks on the ends of the two sticks to keep it from scratching the boat. I think those socks say it all. But then again, it works like a charm. I’m old enough now that embarrassment doesn’t happen too often. In reality, I’m too scared to be embarrassed.

I looked up the word, half-assed. I thought this might describe our approach. But the dictionary of slang says this is objectionable (clearly not in our case).  It means ineffectual, yet our approach does work.  Maybe this is due to nature being kind to us, or we’ve been incredibly lucky, or our time will come.  I fear we are fools, but so far, sailing appears to be foolproof. 

  I could be too cocky, using the word, default. It means inaction, and we do try.  It also means that it reverts back to some preselected setting on a computer. Our setting must be on “Stay upright,” otherwise known to me as “Weebles wobble, but they don’t fall down.” That slogan dates me, but I have gleaned so much comfort from it on the water, thank you, Wham-O. 

     Recently, my poor husband committed a magnificently mortifying feat. We arrived in Monterey Bay after 5 hours on the road, radiator trouble that lead to engine failure, a stop at Casa de Diesel with a kindly tow truck, and two hours’ horror, waiting and rummaging among all the junk sold at Casa de Fruta, Casa de Wine, and Casa de Garlic. Finally pulling into Monterey, we gleefully set up the boat in a record hour and a half and obtained our slip number from the Harbor Master’s Office that lorded over the boat launch. Mast up, motor in place, rudder ready, my husband towed the boat around to the left of other not-quite-ready-to-launch boats, toward the actual launch ramp. I was running down to the ramp to guide him down verbally. 

    KA-BAMMMM! My head snapped to the left, and I screamed. Sea Sharp was nose up off the trailer at a 45 degree angle to the ground. The mast had caught on the street lamp pole, and the boat was suspended in mid air, stern still on the trailer. All other boat folks, not to mention multitudes of tourists gathered. Great. My husband calmly slunk out of the car, sized up the situation, slid back in, reversed (boat lowered back onto the trailer), and drove toward the boat ramp, around the lamp post. Meanwhile, I was shaking hysterically, thinking the boat was falling off the trailer, envisioning a huge bill for a crane to lift it up off the parking lot, not to mention a city bill for the lamp post. 

    Miraculously, the harbor master never ran out of his office, and a number of sailing folks approached me with similar stories. I was bombarded with their calm and chuckles as they reminisced on the times they had hit a lamp post or a tree at a boat launch. Of course, by this time, our glee was nonexistent, and we just wanted to flee home with our tails between our legs. But no, we persevered the coming weekend as the folks who almost dumped a boat on the ramp. 

    We actually have four sailboats. Our newest is yellow, only because it was on sale. The owner’s wife needed him to jettison it out of their garage, pronto. The yellow color is bright and unfortunate; it might attract too much attention. We’ve thought of naming it after ourselves, Bumblers or Bumble B&E. But this might attract more attention or greater expectations to bumble. This boat is adorable, a West Wight Potter, a veritable cork bobbing in the ocean — or bay, since we are too afraid to venture out of the bay into the ocean. I pushed for a smaller boat with a smaller mast, one we could put up without a contraption. Smaller is not easier to sail. It feels the waves and the wind more. You have to move around to counterbalance each other or each turn. It’s a constant shifting of weight and bodies side to side, completely nerve-wracking. Reaching for a water bottle can be harrowing. However, by default again, we’ve had a lot of fun in this boat so far. It reminds me that we must name it soon to not offend aforementioned god/gods.

     My husband and I are approaching retirement. I’d like to be a confident sailor by then. However, this requires “time on the water.” This means successes and failures through experience. I hope I have the stamina. 

     I must say that sailing gives us a lot of latent laughs. Sometimes I want to give up, maybe don a motor boat, but the quiet of sailing is just too lovely. Floating atop water caresses the soul, gauging the breeze tickles the mind to unwind, and zipping though ripples brings smiles to our pride. Here’s hoping sailing by default continues to work its magic and mold us into seasoned salts. 

Herculean Tasks

     I hang my laundry.  I started when I was broke in college and had only one pair of jeans, and I haven’t stopped since. Once, I hung my laundry at a friend’s in La Jolla until the neighbor told me they didn’t do that there, too unseemly. I hung my daughters’ cloth diapers daily in the backyard of my first house, and I hung my laundry through rainy El Nino. I hang laundry to save money, to save the environment, to save my sanity, and to save the smell of the breeze.   

     I am stubborn about it.  I am closer to the sky out there. I am closer to women all over the world out there.  I can tell how long any piece of clothing will take to dry in any weather. In Ireland, women hang laundry in the misty morning, and take it down dry that late afternoon.  They know their sky.  I remember on September 1, 2001, women were called upon to dance out in the full moon’s light all over the world.  I did, all alone. My backyard was brightly gray-blue, the crickets were singing their tunes, and I swayed to and fro, under and around.  As I pin each shirt, each sock, each sheet to the line, I feel like that dancing night, like there are other spirits feeling the same sun at my back and breeze at my side.  

     I don’t know anyone personally who hangs their laundry.  Too busy. Throw it in the dryer with the perfumed anti-cling disposable cloth. Take it out hot and cringing. 

    Hanging laundry gives me a reprieve from the bustle of my day.  I can think in slow motion as I hang each piece.  I work out problems, console myself, plan my hour, and leave myself behind.

     Most days when I hang laundry I spy on my bird feeders or give rubdowns to my dogs.  Last week I almost stepped on a few busy ants.  There is a crack on our patio in which a traffic jam of red harvester ants emerges and submerges.  They lay a path with a stop, start cadence. I stay out of their workweek, but on this particular day, a few were struggling along my clothesline territory.  They were hauling a fallen flower petal. They were having such a hard time handling this awkward load. I wanted to pick it up as a cargo plane, but I could not figure out if they were going to or from the nest. I also couldn’t figure out why.  It was a petal, not a seed. Was it meant for a soft bed, or had they already extracted the nectar and this was refuse?  They reached about 6 inches in 15 minutes, totally parallel to the far off nest. I could only marvel at these mini-He-women.

     I am learning about and teaching odes to my students this semester.  Robert Burns wrote an ode to a louse crawling on a lady’s bonnet in church, Walt Whitman wrote an ode to Lincoln after he died, and Pablo Neruda wrote a whole book of Odes to Common Things.  I am looking forward to reading all the odes the students will laboriously come up with, all the things they will choose to praise. There will be cats, dogs, basketball, ipods, and even parents.  I will choose my clothesline, of course.

     I just learned of the newest appointed US Poet Laureate.  Here is one of his poems:

What Work Is      by Philip Levine

We stand in the rain in a long line 

waiting at Ford Highland Park. For work. 

You know what work is--if you're 

old enough to read this you know what 

work is, although you may not do it. 

Forget you. This is about waiting, 

shifting from one foot to another. 

Feeling the light rain falling like mist 

into your hair, blurring your vision 

until you think you see your own brother 

ahead of you, maybe ten places. 

You rub your glasses with your fingers, 

and of course it's someone else's brother, 

narrower across the shoulders than 

yours but with the same sad slouch, the grin 

that does not hide the stubbornness, 

the sad refusal to give in to 

rain, to the hours wasted waiting, 

to the knowledge that somewhere ahead 

a man is waiting who will say, "No, 

we're not hiring today," for any 

reason he wants. You love your brother, 

now suddenly you can hardly stand 

the love flooding you for your brother, 

who's not beside you or behind or 

ahead because he's home trying to 

sleep off a miserable night shift 

at Cadillac so he can get up 

before noon to study his German. 

Works eight hours a night so he can sing 

Wagner, the opera you hate most, 

the worst music ever invented. 

How long has it been since you told him 

you loved him, held his wide shoulders, 

opened your eyes wide and said those words, 

and maybe kissed his cheek? You've never 

done something so simple, so obvious, 

not because you're too young or too dumb, 

not because you're jealous or even mean 

or incapable of crying in 

the presence of another man, no, 

just because you don't know what work is.

   How appropriate for this Labor Day, a day we spend not going to our workplace.  We celebrate not working, rather than working. How odd. What about the labor of love, a mother’s birthing labor, a wife’s homecooked meal, and a man’s finding his calling? There is labor involved in staying friends, staying married, and staying connected. Labor makes the rewards and the lazy days sweet.  This poem reminds me of the gifts of work.

      Hercules had to do some ridiculous tasks.  The list of them seemed endless.   My perpetual hanging of laundry may seem ridiculous to some, but to me it is worth it!                                                                     ~Labor Day, Sept. 5, 2011